The Affinity of God

I was waking down the street and my ears were screaming from pain. I tried to explain myself why the presence of time was missing today.
'Maybe because I am distracted with so many thoughts.' This answer did not give me any comfort nor relaxed my scattered feelings. I stopped and took a deep breath.
'Do I have to pass by it?'
'Yes, you have to.' the voice in my head answered.
I stopped in front of the cathedral. I had told myself so many times not to look at it and quickly pass by but I could not resist not to lift my weary eyes upon it.
'Perfection' was the first and only word I murmured.
It felt like the cathedral was mocking me, whispering how pathetically mortal I was. The building was rising up the stellar background of the sky like a colossus. Not a single ray of light was coming out of it. Proud and unreachable, only the cathedral could admire the bright stars in the sky. I could read 'might', 'superiority', 'greatness' and 'awe' on every window and arch my eyes laid upon. It was high enough to touch God. It was old enough to rival God. It was ashamed of the tiny mere mortals like me who dwelled the ground down there. The dry bony fingers of the branches were holding the darkness tightly, wrapping the spires with black satin. I could hear the branches swaying in the wind, singing the cathedral a lullaby. The same lullaby God used to sing to the Anglo - Norman kings. And now nothing was disturbing them, nothing was singing along with them. The ground was their chain, the night was their guard and time was their sorrow.
That is why I did not want to walk by and look up this splendid giant. I had to stay there forever in dismay, enjoying this sublime beauty and mysterious divinity that human hands had created for Him.
This ecstasy of mind and motionless of body. This blessing of heart and harmony of soul.
I am still a doubtless atheist, always will be.